I find it funny that we place such high expectations on ourselves. Take our beliefs for example. Oftentimes we take our beliefs very seriously. We'll waste our life away debating with others. Fights will break out over disagreements. War may even come of it. Yes, there are some core things that are worth fighting for. There are things we must act upon instead of idly sitting around. The starving need a helping hand. The oppressed need rescuing...the innocent, a protector.
Yet I think we are too hard on ourselves and each other. When it comes to following Christ, we may mentor and lead others at times, but we will always be disciples - students and followers of Jesus. We cannot expect to get this life thing down perfectly on the first try.
Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. - Philippians 2:12-13
Our salvation is something we have to work out. We're going to spend our entire lives seeking out the mysteries of Christ and searching the depths of God's heart. You've got a lifetime of discovery ahead of you. Don't expect to have it all figured out after a couple of years. If you take yourself too seriously, prepare to be offended. Be a child of faith. Enjoy life and learn every day.